I’ve been really down lately. I’ve had a lot of changes in my life, and with change comes unwanted stress. Sometimes I wish I were a really simple person. Like… really simple. I wish I wasn’t this complicated individual who wants so much out of life to the point in which I enjoy absolutely nothing. I’m always wishing I were somewhere else, with someone else, and doing something else. I can’t enjoy anything. If I’m having a good time, I’m thinking about when it’ll be over, which ends up ruining everything.
It wasn’t much, and it wasn’t super significant, but I feel like I underwent some sort of cleansing today. I took a long jog across town and it somewhat put things into perspective. Too much of my time has been spent inside.
Get in the car. Catch a bus. Go to class. To the office. To the store. Stay inside. Repeat.
The outdoors are just the gaps between our destinations and that isn’t healthy. While on my journey across town, I remembered how revitalizing the fresh air can be. My mom always reminds me to take a deep breath, and as I took in the sweet smell of the eucalyptus trees, my soul opened up and I understood the meaning behind those deep cleansing breaths.
Growing up on a farm put me in tune with nature from an early age, and the outdoors are instilled within my being. No matter how much glitter I throw around the room, I will always have ranch blood in my veins, and I shouldn’t try to suppress that because it’s part of who I truly am.
Stress, struggling, and changes are hard, but I’ve come to appreciate the character hard times can build. For every hardship, I feel as if I’ve come out stronger in the end and undergoing these soul shaping changes is one of the most beautiful part about being alive.