Friday, September 5, 2014

The Girl With The Gaga Tattoo

Everyone who knows me is aware of the fact that Lady Gaga owns my soul. She is my
savior. The prophet. The second coming of Christ. Upon arriving at the gates of heaven, I expect to be told that she is indeed a religious figure who was put on this Earth to save all the little monsters from the danmation of normalcy. To give us the strength to stay true to ourselves, and to remind each and every one of us that we're all God damn superstars, and we were Born This Way. And as our eternal mother began her prophecy here on Earth, the mitosis of the future began.

And thus began the beginning of a new race.

A race within the race of humanity.

A race that bears no prejudice.

No judgement.

But boundless freedom.

And with that, the world was changed. At least mine was.

Becoming a Lady Gaga fan was like finding a part of my soul that had been missing. I felt complete with her, as she gave me so much strength to stay true to myself and the courage to carve out my own space in the world rather than trying to fit into someone else's. She was always there for me-- making me feel less alone, and less afraid.

remember being a lonely 19 year old alone in my dorm room. I didn’t have a lot of friends, was never cool enough to go to parties, and just had no sense of who I was. She helped me find my inner sense of self worth. Not just through her music, but the whole artistry of who she is. She changed my life, and taught me to find my freedom and fight for who I am. 

Seeing her live at the Monster Ball will forever be the highlight of my life. I was finally amongst my people at the greatest show on Earth. She would tell stories and give us words of inspiration during the show. After making a speech about freeing ourselves from all our insecurities, she shined her disco stick into the audience and said:

"I used to pray, and I used to dream that one day, one person would believe in me."

She continued on, putting her hand over her heart and said:

"So when you leave here tonight, know that at least one person believes in you."

And that was the moment of all moments.

Because we just need one person to believe in us. And even know she doesn't know who I am, that doesn't matter. Because it's not about me, per say. It's about the core of my being. My soul. And all the other souls who suffer internally. Who feel like they're not good enough.  No matter if it's Lady Gaga, or an old friend. Sometimes we need the validation that someone believes in us. Because life is just really hard.

I think of those words often, which is sometimes what helps get me through the day and through the darkness.

I struggle a lot internally. My soul is simultaneously the most beautiful and the darkest place I've ever been. My birthday was a few weeks ago, and during that time the internal struggle was really difficult. I went out with my friends, and tried so hard to make sure that everyone was having a good time, that I forgot about myself.

But a few days later when I woke up on the actual day of my birth, I decided that I wasn't going to be afraid anymore. And that I should always carry the strength to fight for exactly who I am. Gaga has been so brave for me, so now it was my turn to be brave for her.

Because I was Born This Way. And that's something I take so much pride in.

When it comes to our birth, it is perceived that this infamous moment in life is not temporal, it is eternal. And on my birthday, I traveled to the city of my birth and got Born This Way tattooed on my body. The understanding of that phrase has changed my life. And now it's forever engraved on my skin as a reminder that I am beautiful in my way, 'cause God makes no mistakes.

I don't ever want any of you to sacrifice who you are for anyone or anything else. Because you're absolutely perfect just the way you are, and I believe in you all.

So now that this story is over, know that at least one person believes in you. Because sometimes that's all it takes.

Xo

Fresh